Holy Shit!

Okay, so its me and John's 3rd night here in Bangkok though the first one doesn't really count (we just drank a beer and passed out in our apartment). Let me start by saying New York has NOTHING on this giant, sprawling, filthy, beautiful ass city. There are no street lights. There are dogs and cats everywhere either sleeping on the street or eating out of garbage bags (the dogs seem prone to developing crazy ass tumors all over the place). You can get a banging bowl of duck and noodles on almost any block for less than a buck. Literally everyone and their mother is riding a street bike like 4 or 5 deep. I think I'm in love. John and I have the good fortune of staying at one of his brother's friends apartments in the Silum district which is more neighborhoody and doesn't have any corny dreaded white people in it. We're exotic and good looking enough that Thai girls break their necks for us even when walking with their boyfriends. I'm still not very comfortable looking like a doof and taking mad pictures of street life so you'll have to bear with the cheesy shit i do post for now. Anyway since i refuse to apologize for what a poor write I am I'm just gonna state some of the noteworthy things we've experienced in the form of a list.

1. yesterday, when adventurously taking an alternative route to our sky train stop, we took several side streets (each narrower than the last) we ended up turning a corner to a dead end where a bunch of tween boys were huffing paint or shoe polish or something. They tried to holler at us but, the only discernible English was "hey you" followed by either instructions as to the way out or insane, awesome sounding cursing.

2. walked through patpong (one of the 3 red light districts here in Bangkok) and looked like superstars as we ignored the endless hordes of arguably some pretty attractive whores. Some of them will grab you and stare deep into your american eyes until you smile nervously and keep walking or pay for sex. Offers for ping pong shows abound. I hear "Super Pussy" has a pretty good one. We're still shopping around.

3. met a pretty cool hong kong chick who spoke decent english on the boat to the wat pho (the temple with a giant ass gold buddha) who ended up chilling with us for like 6 hours as we wandered pretty much aimlessly through old city Bangkok. Along the way we met a ill ass local chick who gave us a ton of good info as to where to party without spending getting to touristy/expensive. She even gave us her cellie. We finally found khao san road, which is the crazy, crowded white hippie spot everyone from elsewhere stays. Fun to visit, wouldn't want to make my way through there every day.

4. stopped at a fair on our way back to the apartment today and watched thai high school girls perform very poor choreography very poorly, while a ladyboy danced super hard and way better right in front of the stage. even the dude singing and the dancer girls laughed a couple times. Families sitting in the audience drank beer and laughed. Then we ate some big ass bugs. The grasshoppers had an unfortunate aftertaste. Some of the vendors laughed as we filmed it.

Its friday night and the streets are pretty popping. We may go back out in search of some authentic nightlife. Tomorrow is the king's birfday so either way tomorow we're getting it in HARD. John's too tired to go upstairs to get his camera dock so corny pictures will have to wait. WE ARE SO ILL. Later suckaazzzzzz.